I had two new thoughts coming out of the subway last night. They were different from my usual two thoughts which are, “Boy I hope I make the train,” and “Damn, fresh popcorn smells delicious.”
My first thought was, “I wonder if it’s too late in the season to get madras plaid pants.” Then I had to Google “madras plaid” to make sure that’s the name for what I was really thinking. I’m still not sure but I’ll know it when I see it. I was seeing a woman in such a patterned skirt, which is what made me think of it. I must have a pretty strong desire to own these pants because my love for the scent of fresh popcorn is nearly unstoppable.
My second thought, sprung from finishing Emily Giffin’s Something Borrowed, was “Is my marriage doomed because I couldn’t figure out a ‘something borrowed?'” I had two ‘something olds’: my engagement ring that was made from the diamonds in my grandmother’s bridal set and the pearls that Josh gave me on our first Christmas together. (Technically I had three ‘something olds’ if you count my blue underwear from high school that I had to dig out of an old dresser at my parents’ house because the blue underwear my girls gave me at my bachelorette party was a size 2.) I think every bride has 100 ‘something news’. Take your pick – the dress, the shoes, the veil, the headpiece… I even had three ‘something blues’: the aforementioned undies, a garter that two of my bridesmaids raced out to get when they found out about the underwear, and the signatures of my bridesmaids and best man on my shoes written in blue Sharpie. I was ready. So ready, in fact, that I couldn’t think of anything to borrow. My aunt called that week and offered to lend me anything I wanted. I just couldn’t come up with anything that I didn’t already have.
Last night I thought, “What does this say about me as a person?” That I fall short of honoring traditions? That I don’t respect history? That I don’t trust others to have nice things? That I plan the details too far, that I can’t go with the flow? Or does it say that I’m far too practical to care about that silly adage? Plenty of people asked me about my ‘something blue’, but no one asked me what borrowed. I didn’t have a sixpence for my shoe either, so I guess I’m short luck and wealth. I’m strong in continuity, optimism and loyalty though. Isn’t that what’s more important? Have people gotten divorced over being unlucky? We’re not even talking about the opposite of luck, just its absence. Can’t we just create our own luck? Haven’t people been doing that for years? I guess the only thing I really borrowed is the trouble worrying about this.
So now, does anyone have some madras plaid pants I can borrow?